Saturday, June 4, 2011

A Letter From Your Nana

Dearest Cooper,
My precious Grandson, you are a true gift from God.  Even your middle name, Grayson, will forever proclaim that you are here by the ‘grace of God.’  You are a miracle.  Don’t ever forget that, and always use it as a testimony to proclaim the goodness of our mighty God.
At 6:42 a.m. on May 30, 2011, Memorial Day, I received a text from your mother saying, “On way to Harris SW.  Having contractions.  Probably nothing.  Don’t worry about coming.”  As any good mother would do, I did not listen.  Your Papa and I prayed before we even got out of bed, I texted your mother we were coming, and then got up to get dressed.  I don’t even remember putting on my make-up.  We were out of there and on our way to the hospital in a flash.  
We arrived at the hospital to find mom & dad a little down, but not too worried.  Early reports from the nurse were she didn’t see anything happening, so they started some medication to stop the contractions.  But they continued.  I sat by the monitor watching and listening to your precious heartbeat.  Papa & I both picked up our cell phones and started texting people to start praying and to call others.  That’s when a miraculous thing happened.  People all over the United States as well as Europe and Africa started praying for you and your family.  Literally thousands of prayers were being lifted up for you.  Then the nurse came in and said something was happening.  An examination verified that suspicion.  They began talking about transferring your mom to Harris downtown ‘just in case’ something happens because they had one of the best NICUs in the area, and they could handle preemies much more capably.  They gave meds for you ‘just in case’ you decided to make your appearance.  In an hour or so, you were on your way to Harris DT.
When mom arrived at Harris DT, she was given a high-tech sonogram and examined by a high risk doctor.   I was with your mom & dad when the doctor came in to deliver the news.  After several tests, the doctor determined in order for you to have a chance to survive, you must be born that day.   There was an infection around you, there was no fluid, and you could not survive if you were not born today.  My heart just sank for your mom & dad.  It was hard for me to listen to, but the doctor was telling this to my little girl.  I wanted to take her pain from her, but I could not.  All I could do was hug her, cry with her, and pray for her.  And I did many times throughout the day.  Again, cell phones came out.  More specific prayers were now being offered up.  Calls, texts, Facebook, Twitter, emails, etc. were being used to get the word out.  It’s amazing how God can use things like these for His glory.   By the time you read this and can comprehend it, these forms of communication will probably be antiquated, but that night, they were a mode of getting word out and asking for prayers.  They were also a mode of receiving encouraging words and prayers.  God’s word says in Jeremiah 33:3, “Call to Me, and I will answer you, and show you great and mighty things which you do not know.”  Many were calling to Him that night on your behalf, and He began to show the world His glory and grace.  Never let go of Him.
I was also with your mom when the preemie baby specialist came in.  I liked him right away.  He was drinking a Dr. Pepper, the official soft drink of the Milburn clan.  He was very blunt and to the point.  He left nothing unturned.  He did not try to sugar coat anything.  At 24 weeks, he did not paint a very pretty picture.   He told of the rough roads ahead and the bumps and potholes that would be faced, if you survived.  My heart ached as it never had before.  I tried to be strong for your mom, but again all I could do was hug, cry, and pray.  Then the waiting started.  That was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. 
The one thing the doctor did not know was the innumerable prayers being lifted up for you and the family at the time.  We have a strong & almighty God that formed your perfect little body in your mother’s womb.  He knew you from the very beginning.  He knew all the days of your life before they even began.  He has plans for you for His glory.
We were encouraged by many stories from friends who knew someone born in the same hospital weighing 2 pounds or less and now they were now anywhere from 3 years old to 30 years old.  It’s amazing how God sends people in your path for encouragement when you need it.
Time passed very slowly that day.  Again, I was sitting at your mom’s side (I had been kicked out once, but came back in after an hour claiming a mother’s right) and I was watching the monitor.  Watching the contractions come closer and harder.  Watching your little heart beat steady as could be.  There were times when you would even kick the monitor and it sounded like someone testing a microphone.  Then that steady line dropped right off the chart.  The nurse came running in and turned up the monitor so we could hear the heartbeat louder.  She began to search for the heartbeat.  No sound.  As she continued searching, all I could do was bow my head, close my eyes, and listen for that first heartbeat.  It didn’t come.  I was praying, but I didn’t know what I was saying.  I just know I was praying.  My heart again ached as never before.  Then the nurse asked us to leave your room.  My emotions overwhelmed me.  As your Aunt Katy and I walked to the waiting room where the rest of the family and friends were, I held back, I could not face them at the time.  Your Papa came around the corner to see what was happening.  I explained to him what had happened.  He said, “I’m going to go ‘loiter’  in the hall to see if I can find out anything.”  He was back in less than a minute and said a whole team of doctors and nurses just went in the room with an incubator.  So your Papa and I walked closer to the room.  A nurse came out and said she just delivered.  Nothing else, but said we could stand close to the room until the doctor came out.  I wasn’t leaving your doorside, so out came the phone again and I texted your Aunt Katy (even though she was just around the corner) – “Just delivered.”  Within a minute she was there.  The doctor finally came out and said you were about this long and held up his hands.  He said you had a heart rate and a breathing tube had been placed in your lungs.  You were alive and well!  We stood there until they whizzed you by on the way to NICU.  I couldn’t see you for the blanket, but I knew you were there.  My heart sang.  News was passed quickly.  Many praises and prayers of thanksgiving were lifted up.  Our God is good.  You were born at 9:32 p.m.
We waited.  Everyone left but Aunt Katy & Uncle Jason, Papa & me.  We hung around as long as we could.  Then the word came.  We could see you.  That’s what I was waiting to hear.  I didn’t want to leave the hospital until I saw the little miracle, the precious gift from God.  So at 2:30 a.m., which happened to be your Aunt Katy’s birthday, I laid eyes on you for the very first time.  Gentle tears of joy were in my eyes as I was looking on your perfectly formed little body.  You only weighed 1.5 pounds, but you were perfect.  You even had eye lashes and fingernails.  It was a beautiful ending to a long, hard day.
Cooper Grayson, you are here by the grace of God.  You are a miracle.  You are an answer to many prayers.  You are a gift.  Always cling to the One who formed you and brought you into His creation.  He has a special purpose for you.
                                                                I love you, little Cooper.
                                                                             Nana

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